特别广播英语第 173 课：Children's Self-esteem 孩子们的自尊心-3

Some parents raise their children to depend on external rather than internal reinforcement through practices such as paying for good grades on report cards or exchanging special privileges for good behavior. 例如，孩子的成绩单上有好成绩就可以得到奖赏，或者他们有了好的行为就给他们一些优待。

The child learns to rely on others to maintain a high self-esteem and is not prepared to live in a world in which desirable behavior does not automatically produce a tangible reward such as a smile, money, or special privileges. 孩子们学会了依靠别人来保持高度的自尊，却对现实世界的生活没有丝毫准备，因为在现实世界中，令人满意的行为并不会自动带来实在的奖励，如微笑、金钱或特权。

Maintaining a healthy self-esteem is challenge that continues throughout life. 保持健康的自尊心是持续一生的挑战。

One family found that they could help each other identify positive attitudes. 一个家庭发现他们可以互相帮助，确定积极的态度。

One evening during an electric storm the family gathered around the kitchen table, and each person wrote down two things that they liked about each family member. 一个电闪雷鸣的晚上，一家人围坐在厨房桌子周围，每个人写下两件他们关于每一个家庭成员的事。

These pieces of paper were folded and given to the appropriate person, who one by one opened their special messages. 这些纸折叠起来给了相应的人，他们一个接一个打开他们的特殊讯息。

The father later commented, "It was quite an experience, opening each little piece of paper and reading the message. 父亲后来评论说："打开每张字条看上面写的东西，那真是很好的感受。

I still have those gifts, and when I've had a really bad day, I read through them and I always come away feeling better." 我依然保存着那些礼貌，当我遇到一个特别糟糕的日子时，看看它们，我总会从中解脱出来，感觉好多了。"

The foundation of a healthy family depends on the ability of the parents to communicate messages of love, trust, and self-worth to each child.健康家庭的基础是靠父母传达给每一个孩子爱、

This is the basis on which self-esteem is built, and as the child grows, self-esteem changes from a collection of other's feelings to become personal feelings about the self. 自尊心从别人的感受变为自我的感受。

Ultimately a person's self-esteem is reflected in the way he or she interacts with others. 最终，一个人的自尊心就反映在他与别人交往的方式上。